with a heavy heart

On of my best friends suffered the unthinkable last night.
Her husband took his own life.
What do you say to offer comfort to someone in this situation? What could I possibly do to ease her grief? Absolutely nothing, in fact. I can certainly pray for her and their two small children (2 and 4 1/2). The younger one's birthday is today actually. But I wish I could do more.
It is so heart-breaking, so unreal, so impossible. Yet, I find myself feeling guilty for not appreciating my own husband as much as I should. Sure, he's got his faults - we all do. But I wish I spent more time being thankful for him; how much he loves Elijah and me, how hard he tries, how much he puts up with from me, how helpful he is sometimes, and how hard he works to support us, in stead of the negative things. It's a wake up call I think.
I wish my friend didn't have to go through this. God help her.